30 Day Paleo Challenge Results

Here I am 30 Days later like Morgan Fuckin Spurlock. 30 Days all Paleo all the time. It has been an adventure...er...not really, but it was pretty fun. I really started with high hopes and stars in my eyes. I was childishly optimistic and really hoping for the magic changes promised in all my reading. Then about a day ago as I was thinking about writing this, I wanted to call bullshit on the whole thing. But I can't do that because the results are there. So lets see 'em.


First I just want to say that I did keep a journal of every day, well almost everyday of this challenge but I went back and read it and I really can't put all that on this post. I got bored reading it and boring readers isn't really a good game plan for a guy that likes to write. So this is the abridged version with some highlights and notes. But there are pictures and that makes it way more fun. If you want to judge my pictures...I'm cool with that.


For any change or challenge I have taken on, the beginning is always the easiest while enthusiasm is high. Its later that things get tough. Like a week ago when I really wanted a fucking Blizzard.



So here we are Day 00-

"Day 00-  1/17/2015

I just finished the book today. I think I got the point but I think I will skip all the expensive blood tests he suggests. I had some pizza today and will most likely get some more junk food in my system tomorrow too. 30 Days without a cheat day will be hard, I have to say my goodbyes. Even though I am not sold just yet, I have to say I am kind of excited to see what happens. I am hopeful it really does what is promised in the book. I guess the only thing there is to do at this point is get started and stick with it.

I just went grocery shopping. Mother of pearl. Money was spent. Basically I had to clear the cupboards and I didn’t realize how much I was eating that was not allowed or riddled with gluten. I had a lot of things that are not with this program and what I perceived to be healthy. I did realize that it is a lot easier to shop when not buying any kind of bread or processed food. You don’t have the read the label on a cucumber. I dig that. But it was basically like starting over. I just spent about $200 on food. Granted that was a heavy load of meat (That’s what she said) and will probably last me most of the 30 Days. I don’t expect the following trips to be quite that bad. But we will see.

Tomorrow I will take my before photos and measurements."

The Day Before- 1/18/2015

Healthy breakfast just because that was easiest to prepare. Some coffee with sugar though. I’ll have to learn to forgo the sweetener and cut back on the coffee definitely. A lot of research shows that coffee causes huge hormonal issues especially with Cortisol and that is a weight loss show stopper.  But as long as you moderate your BLACK coffee intake it seems to be fine. First challenge I am dreading really. Healthy lunch again because it was easiest to prepare. I will probably bid junk food a farewell with some What-A-Burger later though. The war starts tomorrow, I should get the best of my freedom to sin while I can. Honestly that is not the norm for me over the past year, but fuck it, I am doing right now because I can. I also want to start where most people would be starting from. I think that is more fare than going from healthy to healthier.

Day 1- Weigh In

Weight- 226.8 ( My goal was to lose 25 pounds) 

Waist - 46 Inches

Hips- 41 Inches

 

So taking progress pictures is awkward but I promised I would so here they are. This at least gives you an idea of where I started. Party On...

This first week went pretty smooth with no slips and I was extra careful with everything I ate. I will point out that DAY 1 was a day that my friends and I had planned on going out to eat a super feast. I point this out because people always put off starting something because of "plans". You can still start something if you want it more than you want to stick to your "plans". I hated watching them eat cake and Baudouin Balls in front of me though. Bastards. 

So Day 7 Measurements-

223lbs – 3.8lbs down from last week

Waist- 45 inches – 1 inch lost

Hips-  40.5 inches-  half an inch lost

 

So starting out and losing nearly 4 pounds and an inch off my waist the first week was awesome. The first week, I also didn't get a lot of workouts in. Partly because I was really busy with work and partly because I let being busy be an excuse. So without working out, those are pretty good results. I attribute all of that to preparation. I made all of my meals in advance and they were ready to go. At work they kept ordering in fast food and I was oh so tempted, but I held out and it was worth it. Life keeps going even when you have your own agenda and people rarely give a shit about what you are trying to do. If you are thinking of doing this, or anything like it, be prepared for that. Also, it took a couple days before that happened due to my junk food binge before starting. Lastly, I really hadn't seen any other "benefits" of my new eating habits. Sleep didn't really improve and everything else seemed about the same. But, one week is way to early to start seeing all those results right?

Day 15 Measurements

Weight 220.6  Lost 2.4 pounds

Waist – 43.5 down 1.5 inches

Hips – 40.5 Same as last week

 

My first cheat happened on Day 12. I didn't take a picture of it because well as my journal entry below will explain...I really didn't give a fuck. 

Day 12 Journal Entry- 

"Day 12- 1/30/2015

I am getting caught up here. Friday was a crazy and stupid day. I was getting ready to go work out and blew my nose. Then my nose started to bleed. And bleed and bleed and bleed. It wouldn’t stop and it was a lot of blood. I get nose bleeds from time to time but never this bad. So I had to shove some toilet paper in the snout and drive up to the Urgent Care place in my hood. I walked in with bloody toilet paper hanging out of my nose and they politely asked “What can we help you with today?” I just pointed to my face and she handed me a clipboard. Long story short, they couldn’t get the bleeding to stop by any normal means so they had to install a Rhino Rocket. Basically they take a tampon like balloon thing and shove it up your nose all the way into the back of your brain. This was probably one of the most painful things I have had to experience. I almost fainted. For real. Then they inflate the tampon…almost fainted again. That day I did not work out or eat after breakfast. After my little fainting spell, the doctor insisted I drink a little bottle of Gatorade and eat some Goldfish. Then, I didn’t feel like doing anything. Kim was on her way home from Dallas so I asked her to get me some food. By this time I was in pain, starving, and in a general, I DON’T GIVE A FUCK kind of mood. Being that is it was midnight, she got me taco bell. So that was my first slip up. Honestly, I don’t care. Given the situation, it is what it is. After I ate that, I took a hydrocodone and some melatonin and slept in 45 minute increments throughout the night. It was the worst. My face hurt. I really hope that never happens again because knowing how bad the Rhino Rocket hurts, I don’t think I could do it again and I may just have to bleed out and die."

So there it is, pain will make you do what you have to do. 

Week 2 I really didn't see any of the miracle health benefits promised either. But...ONWARD!

Day 21 Weigh in

Day 21- 2/8/2015

Weight- 218.8 Pounds   -Almost 2 pounds lost. Pretty disappointing for the amount of effort.

Waist- 43                       - I wont complain about a half inch. 

Hips- 40

I forgot to take pictures of the measurements this week...But you didn't miss much.

The third week was pretty mundane. I was in a groove and even when I didn't prepare my meals, I was pretty good about sticking with the program. 

We also found a Paleo food truck check it out Picnik  

Day 30 2/17/2015

Weight- 215.6             Grand Total of poundage dropped- 11.2 pounds

Waist-   41 Inches        Total loss of 5 Fucking Inches!

Hips-     40 Inches        Total loss of 1 inch. I guess my hips don't have a lot of fat or I was measuring wrong. 

So the whole point of this was for me to explore the practicality of this "really easy" way of eating. Like I said, a couple of days ago I was cursing the whole thing because I didn't hit the miracle weight loss goal I was looking for and I certainly didn't feel like my whole life was different because of it.

In "The Paleo Solution" by Robb Wolff, he challenges you to do this diet for 30 days and watch how your life will dramatically improve over time. I know that 30 days isn't long enough to mean a lot but the book promised it as long as I would try. And try I did.

So lets look at the reality of it. I lost 11 solid pounds and it got me over the hump I was at. I was lingering around 225 and 226 for awhile and couldn't seem to shake it. This did the trick. But as I suspected, this wasn't the cure all that its proponents would have you believe. Here's what I saw...

1. I didn't follow his recipe and meal plan perfectly because it was hella expensive to do that and I didn't like some of the things on the menu. But I stuck to the principles. No wheat, grains, refined sugar, oats, dairy or any other enemies of the Paleo Kingdom. I did look up more practical recipes and learn to use my Crock-Pot.

2. Maybe I didn't take in the right amount of nutrients at the right time under the right circumstances while my body was aligned with the sun and I was ovulating. But the idea was supposed to be that this wasn't so hard. I know people that eat like that but I haven't reached that level of dedication to education on the subject. However, as long as I was prepared, it really wasn't that bad. I my cravings were mostly mental and this really did curb how hungry I got and how easily I could satiate that hunger.

3. The biggest excuse people have for not eating healthy is that it is too expensive. And yeah, if you go all hardcore you will end up spending $7 on a dozen eggs. But if you can just shop better than you had been, like don't buy things that are frozen or in boxes, and find some free range chicken eggs on the cheap, you will be fine. There is one Paleo eatery in the whole city of Austin and I would guess outside of Austin they are few and far between, so you will be saving a ton on eating out. Eating out also just puts too much shit in your face that probably need to avoid anyway. I had fajitas more times in the last month than I did all of last year. That shit got old. But go shopping, load up on spices and bulk items. The first time might be expensive, but after that it really isn't bad. Try to follow a books suggestions and you will go broke. The internet will be your best friend beyond all the free porn. I also realized that health food from places like Picnik is a lot of times unnecessarily expensive. So just get used to doing it yourself if you are on a budget.

4. Be prepared to change the narrative in your mind about food and eating. Eat for fuel, don't eat for fun. Or as my ex used to say when she would beg me to lose weight "You eat to live, not live to eat". You can't start something like this and expect all your dreams to come true in the 30 Days those gimmick artists say it will happen. But I see the benefits of this diet and will probably continue this way of eating. While it was hard for me to get the right amount of calories in for my active lifestyle, I was taking in more naturally nutritious food. I need to get squared away on my meal prep and macro-nutrient planning though. I also won't ever say "Cheat Meal" again because I realized that concept is stupid. I may partake in some indulgence now and again because trying to lose weight is no excuse to stop living.

5. While I didn't feel huge changes in my well being I did see improvements. Enough improvement for me to buy into the gluten-free idea. I was eating well before I tried this but I would still get stuck and I did have my episodes with depression and lethargy despite my efforts. This past month, my episodes were few and far between and when they did happen, they were far more manageable.


So in conclusion, was it worth it? Yeah. Definitely. I entered it expecting a little too much, but after looking at it practically and with a little reason, I can see that it has it's benefits. One benefit is that it is easy to follow. I will say it again, you don't have to read the label on a cucumber to make sure it's healthy.

So here is my before and after picture.

                             226.8 Pounds                                                       215.6 Pounds







If you want a copy of my journal, message me and I will be happy to email it to you.



So there it is. 30 Days of Paleo living from a real guys point of view. Also I took the last picture in my new pants because I am so happy to have gone and bought a nice pair of jeans, and for once not been afraid I would get too fat for them.

When I lose the remaining 15.6 pounds and hit 200, I will post a pretty crazy before and after. I have my before picture from when I was 270, no shirt, it's scary. haha

Thanks for reading. Hit me up if you have questions!

Weight Loss Information Overload!

Yeah I know a lot of my recent entries are about fitness and healthy living. Well, I write about what I am going through because that is what's happening in my brain.

When it comes to fitness and healthy living there is a lot of information out there. There are a ton of people that want to help and offer advice. Some of these people know what they are talking about. In fact, they know too much and it is annoying. Then there are the folks that are still super unhealthy but still for some reason think that the advice they have to offer is somehow valuable in some way. More annoying. So let's start with them.

There are certain topics of conversation that everyone has some kind of input in. Wondering what is wrong with your car? Post it on Facebook and suddenly all your friends are mechanics or they know a guy. Have some obscure legal issue? Bring that up and everyone you know becomes a lawyer. Want to lose weight? Well everyone that owns a tv or has internet access thinks they are fucking Julian Michaels or something. From there permanent roots on the couch or in their chair, they will spill all kinds of advice, info, and not well researched internet sputum all over you. They will justify this advice as someone they know did it and it worked or they had done in their past and it were successful. This is often followed by the excuse as to why they are not doing it now.

"Well since the baby..."
"I just work too much..."
"Since I got sick..."

And the list goes on. They should google articles on how to overcome making lame excuses. Getting in shape and healthy is hard and I am not going to listen to someone in worse shape than me give me advice on how to better my situation. I don't go to McDonalds expecting to find some healthy food. So if you are that person, shut the fuck up. I know you want to be a part of the conversation and come across smart. The thing is, you have to earn that. Go work out, eat healthy, and struggle with all the mental bullshit that comes with the lifestyle and then you can join the group. Until then, shove another cheesey poof in your mouth and watch TV quietly.



The second group of people are the that are already and always have been in shape. Now these people do come to the table with some credibility. Obviously they have the shit worked out, they have good habits, and probably know a few tricks of the trade. What they do not know is the struggle of going from being fat and out of shape to making better decisions, changing your habits, and working out the mechanics of everything you fucking do every day. People like me have had to completely change the way we think. We started at a deficit. And while we love hearing tips, advice, and best practices, it can become a little overbearing when someone doesn't understand why you don't just immediately get it or change instantly. A good portion of this is mental and emotional. We are becoming different people. Before you start spouting off how easy it is, remember that you didn't start where we did. Lend a hand, be encouraging, but know when to back the fuck off.


The last group can include people that have lost the weight or the people that have always been healthy. But these people are the people that will flood you with information, tips, advice, tricks, and so on. It never ends. And once you think you have tackled one challenge, their "help" tends to make you think you have taken a step back. These are the extremists.

You eat a banana and they will tell you that you ate the wrong kind of banana at the wrong time of day with the wrong hand at the wrong house on the wrong planet.

Fuck you.

The reality is that people that struggle with weight issues are professional rationalizers and excuse makers. Sorry if this hurts feelings but it's the truth. I don't buy into the million and one excuses I hear all the time. If you want it, if your life depended on it, you would find a way to do it. But once you have made the realization and you have started down the path, that is awesome. No one is perfect and there are going to be a lot of challenges in the way that you will have to overcome. Some big but most of them are small minute to minute decisions that you didn't even realize were affecting you in the past. A good example is Mayo vs. Mustard. Your favorite maybe mayo but mustard is the obvious better choice for weightloss. It's crazy because before you just answered without thinking and now you are having to stop and think about it. Each tiny decision like that takes a toll throughout the day.

So when there are these people out there that start regurgitating everything they read on douchefitness.com about how there are radio active meteor particles from the government in your Cheerios, it then becomes another fucking challenge. All the information blends together and you can't remember which vegetables are good and which ones are laced with heroin.

My advice is this. Keep making the small steps and ignore all the information that is not relevant to what you are doing right at that moment. You will figure out the deeper science of things along the way and gradually but right now you are just trying to accomplish one small goal at a time. Don't worry about where the chickens are raised that lay the eggs you are going to eat in the morning. Just make sure you are eating a healthy portion and not snorting pancake batter for breakfast. It's one better decision at a time.

When you are hungry and out and about, your old habit tells you to just swing through Taco Bell because you are busy. Maybe this time, just go to Subway. Even if you get a super unhealthy sandwich, you made a better decision than to keep on the path of Taco Bell. Start there.

When you are grocery shopping, you don't have to read the back of every box you pick up. You know whole wheat tortillas are the better choice than regular ones. You know that even though milk is bad for you, 2% is better than whole milk. Drink lots of energy drinks? Try some coffee instead. Want a soda? Maybe a water this time.

When you reach out grab something, just think what the slightly better alternative to that will be. Eventually, your whole grocery basket will look different. Instead of boxes and boxes of processed food and frozen dinners, there will be more fresh food. The key word is eventually.

My point is that in this overly conscious and slacktivism driven world, no matter what you buy, someone is going to tell you that there is something better. Or how one ingredient in it has been proven to kill rats. Everyone thinks they are informed and will try to help with shit that doesn't help what you are dealing with right now at this very moment in your life. If you can train your brain to go on autopilot of those small decisions that we deal with day to day or minute by minute, then you can focus your attention on the bigger things like joining a work out program or really drilling down on your eating habits and what you are eating. It all starts with habits. It all starts small. For me this whole things started with booze. It was killing me. So I decided to get rid of it. When I did that, that is all I did. I didn't care what I ate, I didn't exercise, I smoked, and I did pretty much whatever I wanted to as long as I didn't drink. Goals are important to have, and setting deadlines is helpful, so I set some soft deadlines to reevaluate things when I go to them. The first 3 months of being sober I didn't do shit because a person only has so much willpower and decision making ability to spread around through the day. After 3 months, I reevaluated where I was and made the decision to start eating healthier. And where did I start? Just by making small better choices. Cooking at home instead of eating out. Wheat instead of white and so on...After a little time, about 2 months I stepped it up to full on clean eating, food measuring, ingredient reading kind of stuff. I gave myself nearly 6 months to start all of that. In that 6 months I still last 30 pounds and I didn't die of corporate poisoned food. Weird huh?

My biggest piece of advice if you want to take it is keep it as simple as you can. Just make sure you are at least stepping in the ride direction before you start running. That is the easiest way to get frustrated and have a burger out of sheer spite. Don't listen to everything everyone has to say. You aren't stupid. You are just learning and practicing. Tony Romo can tell you how to through the perfect pass but you have to practice at it and fuck it up a few times before it will come to you. Set some goals but dial them back a notch. If you want advice, ask someone but be careful who you ask. Beware the extremists. They can be more of a problem than a help.


As I am typing this I realized there is one last group I can quickly mention...The "Short Cutters"

Anyone that tries to sell you something, or mentions something that is going to "knock that weight right off" is an asshole. Healthy eating and living is a lifestyle. It is habit. It is not easy at first. But there is no shortcut. Sure, if you are in situation of lose 100 pounds or you will die in the next year, then you may need to do something extreme and I am sure a doctor or nutritionist will be available to guide you through that. Other than that, smoothie fasts, pills, and deprivation diets are stupid. You have to just learn how to eat right and the right things to eat. This has to last you the rest of life. Not 7 days of drinking of chocolate flavored powder that makes you poop 8 times a day. Network marketing nerds are the worst about this. The problem is they are not health specialists, they are sales people and have no business suggesting this to anyone. We need food. There is no 3 weeks to sexy beach abs for people that are 20 pounds or more overweight. There is a bigger issue that has to be addressed gradually. The biggest reason for that is so after you literally work that ass off, it doesn't come back. Also most of those things just make it harder to lose the weight the next time. There are no shortcuts but you have your whole life to live and you don't have to be in a hurry. When you do it right the first time, you will feel a lot better about it and those same assholes will be out there on yo-yo diets spending hundreds of dollars on garbage. Just eat! Eat well! Stay hydrated and don't let yourself get hungry!

God bless you if you are just starting the transition.  If you are in the thick of it, keep going! That is where I am. If you have made it to your goal weight, encourage people but don't be a douchebag about it. Try to remember how if felt for you.

That being said, I am hungry and I need to eat my lunch.